Ashley

Freezing!

The biggest thing I notice is that she could use a little more light in her eyes. I know it's hard to get perfect catchlights outdoors but there aren't any in the first picture. She has gorgeous blue eyes and I would have liked to see them really sparkle. The second image has her eyes shaded by the hat, but it's not bad or dark actually.  Where it's not a headshot the eyes aren't as important.

Can you tell us a little more of what type of shoot you are going for? If I have more of a defined goal you were trying to achieve I can offer more opinions (I am not going to call it advice because of how subjective this type of stuff is).
Is this a HS senior type shoot where it's portrait-ish with a touch of glamour? A fashion shoot where you are trying to sell something (clothing, makeup, the model herself)? A glamour shoot where you are trying to show the beauty of the model? Something completely different?

and if you are not using flash or any other lights how do you get a catch light in their eyes?

I can tell I guess that's why I asked.  I wasn't sure if you were going for something specific or not.

I am not sure if it's the pose or the outfit in the second one, but it's not flattering. It's also a little "Model Posing 101". Nothing wrong with it, I just think you could have thought of something more creative than hand-on-the-hip.

I hope someone else chimes in, I can only offer opinions from my experience.

catch-lights are reflections. With all that snow, all you had to do was get her in the right position. (yes its hard, why I always use an off camera flash) as far as the pose, its fine. Her clothes are what the problem is. Her pants are twisted, her top is bunched. I shoot mostly glamor so what I always am looking for is that "S".  If she had pushed her right shoulder back a bit, it would have straightened them and given a little more curve.